Now think about this next time you’re flying into LA; when you come over the beautiful mountains, and you see the ocean out in the distance, and you scan the landscape and then suddenly see LA… what is that?

That’s cancer.

It’s big, and it’s brown, and it stinks, and there’s smoke coming out of it, and it’s getting bigger every day.

Just like mold on a sandwich. When you see mold on a sandwich, how do we know that mold isn’t conscious? Maybe each one of those individual mold spores thinks he’s a bad motherfucker, and that there ain’t never been a mold spore like him. He works hard every day to consume as much of the sandwich as he can, to impress the other mold spores. He thinks he’s independent, but meanwhile to us he’s just a part of what we see as one unit of mold when we open of the fridge.

Maybe that’s how we look to someone watching from afar.

Just look at the way things are heading… we never stop breeding no matter HOW bad the traffic gets. Isn’t it possible that there are too many fucking people? But you can’t say that, because babies are beautiful and the most loving creatures on god’s green earth.

I’m not saying babies aren’t cute, I just don’t think you should be allowed to have 16 of them. I read about a chick in Little Rock Arkansas recently that just gave birth to her 16th fucking kid. That has got to be one of the most insane things you could ever see in your life. Those kids must be like wild fucking animals.

I bet they don’t even know how to read. They’re probably just running around like crazed chimps, flinging shit at each other, destroying everything in sight, fucking each other, and killing and eating small animals, while their Zoloft popping, Valium taking mother just stands there, white knuckle gripping the bible, doing the best that she can to keep her head from literally fucking exploding.

You can’t raise 16 kids and keep track of all of them. It’s impossible.

I’ve got 3 dogs, and I can barely keep an eye on those motherfuckers, you’re telling me you can keep a constant eye on 16 humans?

It’s accelerating and no one is even mentioning it. No one ever had 16 fucking kids in the past! But now days you hear every other fucking month about some bitch who drowned 5 of her kids because she went crazy. And as the father is on the news talking about the tragedy, no one says, “OF COURSE SHE WENT CRAZY, YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!!! She had 5 fucking kids!!”

How do you NOT go crazy with 5 kids?

Her retarded husband is never home to help, because he’s pulling double shifts at the local donut press, and everytime things get tough, he puts on the guilt trip and lets everyone know that he’s got 5 hungry little ones at home, and he needs the extra shifts.

That poor lady probably couldn’t even help herself. Maybe what really happened, was amidst the turmoil and chaos of those little fucking monsters screaming and shitting on each other, she had a moment of clarity. For the sake of the human race, maybe she realized that she had to drown those kids in the tub.

Who knows… maybe her drowning her nightmare kids saved us 2 weeks of extra time before the apocalypse.

In the long run, it’s not going to help, though. You can see the direction this thing is headed in, and it’s not slowing down.

Strap yourselves in, and spark one up for the ride.

Let’s keep this party rolling until the little grey spacemen pull the plug.