Van_Da_Man wrote:
I've also heard that while Mel gets angrier and angrier she starts getting extremely calm and almost cocky, I've never heard the tapes but that can't be normal? If I'm getting screamed at I'd at least be yelling just to get a word across. I think she took advantage of the old fart-for-brains actor and is gonna get freaking rich off this for no reason at all.
She stays calm throughout the tapes (I have listened to all of them), but her voice is absolutely defeated, not cocky at all. The few times she does defend herself and begins to gain confidence, he begins yelling again, and she trails off again. I know very well what it is to sound like that; Mel Gibson is verbally and emotionally abusive and should not be defended in any way. I do not have that belief about people very often at all, but in this case, having heard the tapes and identifying with how Oksana sounds, knowing what it takes to make a person that resigned, I see absolutely no reason to place any blame on her. I would guess that the only reason she still defends herself at points is that their relationship has not been a particularly long one, and I very much doubt that he was abusive at the beginning; because of those things, he has never managed to break her fully. Besides that, some are simply born with assertive, tenacious personalities and will never stop defending themselves regardless of the risks involved in doing so. Not everybody reacts to being screamed at by screaming back, either. I know because I am one of those people, and my reaction to being screamed at is to shut down and hide internally, which outwardly manifests itself in an extremely calm demeanor and sounding like Oksana.
Edit:
I do think, though, given statements released by Mel Gibson's ex-wife, that he has not always been the way he is now and that it is likely caused by alcoholism. I would even venture to say that there is probably a reason he is as angry as he is, and that he has a right to be angry; but it should be worked out and healed elsewhere, never revealed and unleashed on others due to alcohol abuse. I can still have sympathy for him on that level (which is mainly based on speculation, I admit; I dislike engaging in that but am trying to be fair), but I cannot defend or excuse his actions in any way.